Our Oil Solution

I've held back on this hoping that I could somehow profit from the idea but now I feel I owe it to America to offer my solution to America's dependence on foreign oil.

We need to buy more, not less, oil from the Middle East. I mean really buy...a lot...right now. As the great global consumer of things we really don't need American's need to start all but bathing in the stuff.

Run up your credit cards. Fill every bucket, pot and pan in your house with petrol. I mean Mickey Mouse when it rains kind of containers. Think of new and ingenious ways to use crude. Strip the paint off your walls with it. Barbecue with it - not as charcoal starter but as a replacement FOR charcoal. Kill off unwanted dandelions. Make your own fireworks. Be creative. Embrace America's natural giftedness in finding ways to waste fuel and light things on fire.

So drive to your mailbox. Take trips just to watch your odometer spin. Hit the road whenever you want to listen to the radio. Drive back and forth over the central and eastern time lines just to see if you can somehow disrupt the space-time contineum. Try and outrun the sunset - or if you're from Indiana, the approaching stormfront. Drive to California and try to catch a glimpse of TomKitty. Consume, consume, consume!!!

The quicker we use the world's oil, the better. Since this is all non renewable, the world will run out of it eventually. Let's just hurry up the process. When the Shieks and oil barons run out of the stuff, so does their power. What's Dubai without oil? A desert with a bunch of shopping malls and a palm shaped subdivision. Sand and camels. Oh and the foundation of human civilization - but let's face it, that's not really important.

And when there's no oil left? The world will have to start looking at ethanol. It goes without saying that the Middle East will never be able to produce enough corn to contend with our farmers. Europe? To borrow a term from an animated hero of mine, those "cheese eating surrender monkeys" would never dig up their wineries (or "whineries" in the case of their international involvement) to have them replaced with corn. And America knows all about producing too much of the stuff.

After all, this is is the home of 4H. We have towns with names like Farmer City and Heyworth and Ethanolia...good, American, farm towns. We have corn festivals and put things like "Soybean Capital of the World" on signs welcoming people to our cities.

So it would come full circle back to the American farmer. He feeds the world now. One day he will fuel the world. But only if we help waste oil.

Goodbye do-overs

Every few days I catch myself reflecting over our last few weeks in Africa. Recently I've been drawn to something a bit less geographically defined.

Are there people in your life you would like to say goodbye to again...differently? Maybe you simply didn't get a chance to say goodbye because you missed crossing paths one last time. Maybe you saw the person but you were too busy to give them the attention they rightly deserved. Perhaps you were in a bad mood because you hadn't slept in days and their country had invited you to leave. Maybe someone else was there so you couldn't be as open with that person as you would have liked. Maybe you didn't understand how valuable that person was until later.

And now I wouldn't know what to say if I could do it over.

Ahead of the curve?

Since moving to Indy, my wife and I have been internet nomads. We go next door to use the wireless at PCCC - often resorting to borrowing one of the neighbors' waves when our first choice thwarts our attempts; we go to the public library; I've even wandered throughout the backyard hoping that some signal would come floating by so we could connect without leaving the general vicinity. Because we have our own cell phones and don't plan on staying in one place very long, we've been reluctant to get DSL or dial-up access in our home.

The problem with this nomadic lifestyle is that we are rarely able to look at the internet at the same time. If we're at the library together, Amanda or I need to be watching "@". Sure, we could take him next door but do you know how many places there are to hide in a building that seats 1200 on a Sunday?

So after much stalling, we broke down and decided to get an aircard that would allow us to use the internet from our laptops anywhere. Verizon had a nicely priced plan and since we were already customers, we decided to byte the bullet. After a day of frustration spent calling tech support with both Dell and Verizon, it became clear that it wasn't going to work.

In our attempt to get newest, most cutting-edge computer we could - knowing that in three years even that would be obsolete - we actually bought a computer that uses a newbe "express card" drive. They don't even make aircards for it yet.

Thankfully, Dell reassured us that someone, somewhere, would be coming out with one...sometime.

Note: This seems eerily similar to the time Dad purchased a Texas Instruments 99 4a computer for the family just before the computer division of that company went bankrupt. Gosh I miss Munchman.

Infant Game Ideas?

Just wondering if anyone has a suggestion for "My First Video Game" for my son. He's shown a real interest in using the laptop and I figure that it wouldn't hurt to get him started with something educational now - maybe that way he wouldn't start messing with Civ.

True, I may have timed this poorly since he has discovered that outside is an absolute blast. We had ducks in our yard yesterday after he went outside at the gym and we had a picnic at the local park. Today he ran to the gate and indicated, through sign language, that he wanted "more outside." Translation: He wanted to go to the church's jungle gym next door.

So any non-online game suggestions would be appreciated. Especially if they could encourage his vocal language use.

What if Indonesia...

What if Indonesia is just one giant Chinese restaurant? That's what I dreamed last night. I was in Asmara's world famous China Star restaurant and went out through those back doors I'd never had to resort to using (they lead to the bathroom and since there are only about a half-dozen public toilets I'd willingly use in all of Africa...). On the other side was a huge generic version of every American Chinese buffet but instead of food, society was available for the grazing. It was a smorgasborg of life. There were markets in one nook, what appeared to be a United Nations Meeting in another, people having their Easter Church services, an old man and his grandson fishing in the koi pond/bowl, a wedding (red-dressed bride no less) near the mall entrance...It was amazing. All you can experience for only $4.95.

Sorry, beverage not included. Ribeye and lobster only available on the Sunday buffett.

So maybe I was wrong

Despite what I said in my last entry, apparently I CAN'T indulge in an extra thousand or so callories a week. Amanda and I went in for our "six week checkup" at the fitness center and while I did gain an extra pound in muscle mass, I also gained a couple of more. I blame all the extra weight on the fact that I haven't had a haircut during those six weeks. And I haven't shaved in a couple of days. And I needed to pee. And I my fingernails are getting a bit long. Oh, and I've been reading alot recently so my brain is full...

The good news is that I now need an additional 100 calories a day just to keep up my muscle mass.

I think it's time for a Cadbury Egg.