Bag o' money

My bank creeps me out.

Once they made an error in my bankbook and rather than waiting for me to bring the book in the next day, they sent a van full of people TO MY HOUSE to fix the typo. A bank that makes house calls?

When I go to my local branch, I am often ushered from the back of the line to the counter for "priority" customers. One teller was chastised when she didn't notice me and I was stuck waiting for nearly five minutes before a surpervisor noticed me and called me to the front. I was offered a sincere apology for the wait.

More recently they took my passport and bankbook while I waited at the counter. There was a "minor problem" they explained but they'd fix it shortly. Half an hour lately, as I had memories of a certain gov't "minor problem" a few years ago running through my head, they finally came back with my documents and the explanation that their printer had jammed.

On my way out if the parking lot I was stopped by two of the security guards. Rambling in a couple of versions of English, the national and local languages, they utterly confused me. Finally, they got around to explaining that one or both of them would appreciate being hired as as a security guard for my house or business. This is not typical. There are guards for communities and banks and huge businesses but not much more than that.

My last visit was even more odd. I was just planning to use the ATM in the bank's foyer but when I arrived I was quickly ushered inside. I had forgotten my money the last time I was at the bank. They walked me to the front and brought the bills from the back. Thousands of them. Even in local currency, it probably amounted to several thousand dollars worth of paper. They brought me, literally, a bag of money. They never asked for my ID or even my name. They just offered me several bricks of varying denominations and expected me to go on my way.

The problem was, I hadn't forgotten any money. I'd never withdrawn anything near that amount and hadn't been in the bank for several days. I explained this and who I was and that I really wasn't there to do anything but pay my electric and phone bills through the ATM. They reluctantly accepted my answer and took the money away.

Odd.